Drug Test This

Business Crimes Prof: "Don’t take notes on this… But if I was in Michael Vick's situation, I’d be getting stoned regularly too."

Overheard by anonymous

Priorities

1L #1, before the property final: "My four-year-old stepdaughter helped me study. We had a nice talk about abandoned, lost and mislaid property, and about interests in the land of others. A few hours later she asked whether shipwrecks could have appurtenant easements."

1L #2: "And how did you answer?"

1L #1: "I told her I didn't know, after several minutes of over-thinking the problem. I think, at that moment, I would have rather explained how babies were made or why her mommy and her daddy can't live together."

Overheard by SR

E.T. has rights too

1L: I don't care if she thought they were aliens, she's still intending to harm an alien.

Overheard by PM

Ye of little faith

2L #1, during a Professional Responsibility study session: "I give myself five years before I'm
disbarred."

2L #2: "Really? You think it will take that long?"

Overheard by EW

I can be bought!

Contracts Prof: Your employer wants to change your employment from only firing for cause to employment at will. Would you agree to that?

1L: I would never do that.

Contracts Prof: But what if they promised to double your salary?

1L: I would totally do that.

Overheard by SR

Kids on Drugs

Crim Law Prof: Marijuana is a gateway drug!? Listen, breast milk is the real gateway drug, okay?

Overheard by CD

Well, there was a handshake...

Contracts Prof: "Contracts aren't masturbation; two people are required for a valid contract."

Overheard by AM

Candy is Dandy...

Eccentric Torts professor to frightened 1L class, while on a tangent about rape:

Eccentric Torts professor: "Because it's so utterly dull to go through the game of romance, am I right guys? All men know that candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."

Overheard by VB.

and liquor is quicker!

Prof: You can never unilaterally f#ck your spouse....oh wait, somehow I have three children running around so maybe it is possible.

Overheard by AM

Useless takes on a whole new meaning.

Career Planning Counselor: Well sometimes it helps me to imagine the worst case scenario. So what's the worst case scenario?

3L Looking for Job Advice: Not getting a job when I graduate in two months so I'm unable to meet my living expenses or pay back student loans, and have to live in a cardboard box in Central Park.

Career Planning Counselor: Yes, but at least you'll have your health.

3L: --Dumbfounded Silence--


Overheard by KDB

Best Little Whorehouse in the Country!

Con Law Prof: Would it surprise you to find out that the government was running a whorehouse?

1L: You mean other than Congress?

Overheard by LM

That's a costly return

Professor, talking about why a real estate contract can be canceled by an attorney: "You've heard of buyer's remorse... some of you are married."

Overheard by JS

The truth behind Craig v. Boren

Prof: And why would the state want to allow 18 year old women to buy beer, but not allow men to buy beer until they were 21?

2L: So girls would actually buy beer for once?

Overheard by JHC

bathroom definitions

In the bathroom...

3L #1 in a stall: I've been peeing a lot lately. I guess it's all the fluids.

3L #2 in next stall: It must be the tea, tea is a diuretic

3L#1: No, "diuretic" means it makes you poop, but I've only been peeing.

3L#2: No, "diaretic" means it makes you pee, that's why you're peeing, from drinking the tea.

overheard by: bitch you're peeing because it's a liquid

She was thanking him for last night

In the midst of Student #1 answering questions about a Property case, student #1's cell phone rings in class:

Student #1: Sorry, it was my mom.
Student #2: Oh, was it for me?

Overheard by LH

NOTICE!

Hi everybody. As you've probably noticed, Overheard was on virtual hiatus for quite some time. I've graduated and my third year didn't give me enough awesome class time to eavesdrop.

However, I've come to the conclusion that Overheard is going to stay open even though most of my original posters are no longer in school to lurk in corners overhearing your greatness. I've got quite a few contributions from readers to start with this week. The people who have posting privileges can continue to post, but otherwise, I am going to be posting the contributions every SUNDAY EVENING. Please use overheardinlawschool@gmail.com to submit your contributions.
If you want to be a permanent poster, write me a paragraph about why you think you're funny.

Love,
LiserDoesLaw (a.k.a. Overheard In Law School's admin)

cruel and unusual?

Law School Grad waiting for bar results: My dog needs to get three shots around the same time bar results come out. So if it goes badly, i guess i can ask the vet to put me down...